Wake Up In The Morning, Feeling Like…

October 14, 2011

Whether it’s back to school or back to work, a change in schedule is never seamless. This is especially true when you go from sleeping from roughly 4:00am to noon and now have to be up at 7:00am every day. It’s a bitch, really. You should be on your third hour of sleep and suddenly [...]

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For The First Time In Months…

October 13, 2011

I went back on Google Reader and started reading your blogs. I love you. I miss you. I finally have internets at home. I feel like I’ve missed out on so much in the lives of people who really do mean a lot to me. My fellow bloggers and readers aren’t just imaginary internet people. [...]

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October Goals!

October 5, 2011

I’m not sure why I love this month so friggin much, but I do. Who knows what random associations and pavlovian triggers have been proggramed into my brain without me realizing it. Yesterday I talked about some of the significance of October, but I’ve loved it much longer than that. When I was little, I [...]

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Skanky Tuesday: The Wild Year

October 4, 2011

Do you know what happened last October? It was the month of The Boy. It was the month that I stepped off my own beaten path to find out what life would be like without the puritanical standards I had held myself to for so long. I’d been battling with myself over the past few [...]

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223.3lbs, Didn’t Weigh-In Last Week

October 3, 2011

Wow, I mean, wow. It’s October. While most people look forward to Starbuck’s Pumpkin Lattes and fall drinks, I look forward to Buttered Rum. It’s one of those drinks you have to slow down and savor because it’s so rich but it just feels like the epitome of cozy. And it’s really helpful for weight [...]

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221.8lbs, 2lbs Gained This Week

September 19, 2011

Um… oops. This week tested me in pretty much every way possible. On Monday I was completely blindsided by something that not only shocked me into silence (I’m sure you can guess what a challenge that is), but completely changed my view of one of the important people in my life. I sat in silence [...]

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219.8lbs, Sugar Is Not My Friend

September 13, 2011

On Friday morning I was 217.4lbs… and then came the weekend. Oops. It’s not like I’m heartbroken or anything, I know that it’s water weight and bloat from the dinners out over the weekend. I ate more bread, pasta, and desert than I have in a long time and I felt the consequence of it [...]

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224.2lbs, And It’s A New Day

August 22, 2011

Sunday Night Pre-Weigh In: I’m about 90% sure that I’m going to have gained an absurd amount of weight back and I’m okay with that. These last few weeks have been some of the hardest times I’ve been through in a long time. Every day has been a fight to not let the emotions of [...]

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Green Tea and Running

August 19, 2011

“What am I supposed to do now? What’s the process?” I asked through my fingers, hands smashed to my face, as I was sitting with my mom out on her deck. “I don’t think that there is a process. I think it just takes time. You just have to go through it one day at [...]

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Skanky Tuesday: Coming Out Of Hiding

August 16, 2011

[Disclaimer: this post discusses sexual assault. Though it is not explicit, it does contain descriptions of my memories from the night that could be triggering.] “Kendra the Collapsible emerges at last,” that certain someone said with a smirk, followed by a kinder smile. “I’m so sorry,” I said, leaning on the doorframe to keep myself [...]

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